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Advice Column Question & Answer

Subject: Having an Affair?



QUESTION:

How do you ask your lesbian wife if she is having an affair? My wife and I have been married along time. We each have a small stash and house money. Not alot. We tell each other when we touch the house stash to replace it etc. Our private stash is our own. I had to get stuff for a Birthday dinner for a friend. House was out of money and I was low. So I went to borrow from her stash that I had just given her money too. No stash. Small amounts of house money have been missing also. That's strange also. Her hours are ruff so I never ask when she is late I just think its work.Now, I am starting to wonder? Not sure what to say to her? Am I nuts or is maybe something going on? Thanks

REPLY:

I think the only way to solve this is to TALK to her. You don't have to accuse her or make accusations - just ask. It's when we don't talk to our partners when something doesn't seem right that things can spiral out of control and trust can be lost. Talk to her and find out. There may be a perfectly reasonable explanation. Take it from there.

- KT

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